Adventured of Red and Ted
by GypsySoul05
Summary: So Santana and Rachel are dating and they have two best friends that kind of just don't get why S & R are together. Red doesn't get Rachel's crazy. Ted hates that Santana steals his snuggling time with Rachel. Updates are just sporadic snapshots of what their life and friendship is as they grow together. This is pure Fluff and fun :) thanks
1. Chapter 1

**Authors Note:**

**My first cross over, Ladies and gentlemen. Ok I know it's a bit of a train wreck, I was sitting at work yesterday and this is what popped in my head. I place Naya and her M&M commercials, as well as catching a few scenes of Ted the other night before I fell asleep. I could totally see miserable lonely Rachel making a wish that she had a real live walking talking bear as her best friend. So here it is I have like three chapters all written up. Depending on if this is reviewed , and enjoyed as the FLUFF that it is I will continue to write what pops in my head with this story line. I don't think there will be a set storyline that follows dates, I think it will be more just jumping around of things that will happen to them, and they will all be short little drabbles of Pezberry Life.**

**Thanks **

**Taylor**

**Please read and review**

**}|{**

**JUNIOR YEAR**

"Get your furry paws off my hobbit."

"We're sleeping, Diablo." came back a muffled grumble.

"Raaccchhh!" Santana whined.

"Hey Baby." Rachel smiled up at the Latina, from her napping position on the living room sofa. "You're home early."

"Rachel!" Santana crossed her arms under her chest.

"What?"

"Fuzzy and his paws!" she pointed to the large teddy bear who was using Rachel as his own body pillow, his hands and head resting on Rachel's chest.

"Oh Ted wake up." she nudged him gently.

"He's awake," Santana muttered.

"What? You're not the only one that gets to snuggle, Diablo. I was here first." he said standing on the sofa straddling Rachel's bare thigh. _Fucking cheer shorts._

Santana snatched the bear off Rachel and the sofa and stuffed him not so gently into the arm chair, before hopping gently on Rachel on the sofa, herself. "Well I'm here now. And I'm not going anywhere. I'm not giving her up." she said through clenched teeth to the oversized bear, then smiled sweetly to the girl under her. She kissed the still mostly napping girl softly. "Hi." she whispered.

"Hi." Rachel smiled up at Santana her eyes still clouded with sleep.

"You have a room for that."

"Shut it Red , or I'm pulling out the whip cream."

Red looked panicked, glanced over at Ted who was still shooting a glare at Santana. However the devious bear smirked at his friend as he quickly started singing . "I would do anything for love, but I won't do that!." in a mocking tone to the oversized red M&M.

"Right, Ted lets go hit the pipe, and watch a movie." Red hustled to the steps that led to the second floor. "Lesbians these days, can't live with them, wouldn't be alive without them."

**So tell me what you think. Pure silliness I know**

**Thanks **

**Read and Review**

**Taylor**

**}|{**


	2. Chapter 2

**Authors Note:**

**My first cross over, Ladies and gentlemen. Ok I know it's a bit of a train wreck, I was sitting at work yesterday and this is what popped in my head. I place Naya and her M&M commercials, as well as catching a few scenes of Ted the other night before I fell asleep. I could totally see miserable lonely Rachel making a wish that she had a real live walking talking bear as her best friend. So here it is I have like three chapters all written up. Depending on if this is reviewed , and enjoyed as the FLUFF that it is I will continue to write what pops in my head with this story line. I don't think there will be a set storyline that follows dates, I think it will be more just jumping around of things that will happen to them, and they will all be short little drabbles of Pezberry Life.**

**Thanks **

**Taylor**

**Please read and review**

**}|{**

**SUMMER BEFORE SENIOR YEAR**

"Seriously!" came the high perfect pitch sound of a very infuriated, discordant diva.

Santana cringed looking up from her hidden place in the sofa pillow fort. ""Babe you're home early."

"Don't you babe me Santana Lopez!" she huffed and kicked at the debris that made a mockery of her living room. "You three are impossible! You promised!"

"But Rae…"

"Ted don't you dare even speak to me." she narrowed her eyes and the bear froze in his place.

"Fuck!"

"Language!" she shot the three of them equally glacial crestfallen looks. "The list is on the fridge. I'm leaving I'll be back in one hour, if everything isn't …well I don't have to explain myself." Rachel grabbed her yoga mat and Ipod which she finally located under three empty packages of Oreos. The growled in frustration then marched to the front door slamming it, causing all three of them to jump.

Santana scrunched her face up and looked around the living room. "Fuck this is bad."

"Dude why is your girl so Loca?" Red demanded from his position ontop of the entertainment center, well what was left of it.

Both Ted and Santana turned on him all but foaming at the mouth. "Whoa I'm kidding.' he muttered backing up from their view scaling the wall.

Santana snatched out her phone from her back pocket and called Quinn. "Q we've had a Berry melt down."

"How bad?" Quinn asked already worried, by the sound of her tone.

"Scale?"

"One to Ten?"

"Rememeber that time that Kurt told Rach that you cheated on Britt?"

"Oh Fuck." Quinn whimpered through the phone.

"Yeah, " Santana whispered wiping a tear that had gotten away from her.

"I'm on my way. What do you need?" there was a distinct sound of rustling of clothes over the line.

"The whole team. I've and hour."

"What happened?"

"We..um..well you know Rachel has voice lessons and dance class on Mondays and is gone until late at night.." Quinn murmured her agreement. "Well the guys and I decided to chill, smoke a little and then well… we thought dumb things were a good ideas." she finished lamely.

"Say no more, you better call Puck. I'm sure there's something that needs fixing."

Santana whimpered again. "And the list."

"NOT THE LIST!" Quinn shouted there was a loud noise as if she fell down, or knocked something over.

"I'm sorry."

"We're all going to be. Thanks a lot S!" Quinn hung up the phone in the middle of a cursing tirade.

Meanwhile Santana tried to pick up the pieces of the coffee table and the entertainment center that were scattered on the living room floor.

"I told you it was a bad idea. I told you we were going to get caught." Ted said frightened, from his spot on the ceiling fan, where it was dilapidated and making slow revolutions from the ceiling. "Do you know what's on that list Diablo?"

"Shut up Ted, " Red muttered taking off his helmet. 'You were doing things too."

"Do you think that she'll really kick us out this time?" Santana worried her lip looking at her two friends.

"I don't know this isn't as bad as the jell-o incident but it's worse then the science experiment." Ted admitted picking up the burnt pieces of the sofa.

"I forgot about the Jell-o, good times." Santana quipped.

"You were hospitalized, how did you forget ?" Ted demanded.

"Who knew you couldn't snort Jell-o?" Red laughed. "Now you know, knowing is have the battle…"

"Shut up Red or I'm gonna forget that I'm allergic to red dye 40." Santana shouted, dashing away the tears as she manically started to clean. Red backed off with his hands in the air.

When Rachel returned home exactly one hour later the house was immaculate. There was dinner on the stove, the basement living room set was now in the actual common placed living room on the main floor, and the fresh sent of her favorite cleaner was in the air. Even the carpet was new. She raised a brow at that. The house smelled of lilac, a secret favorite that few knew about.

Looking around Rachel wasn't able to see anyone on the first floor. She carried her work out bag and accouterments up the stairs and into her bedroom.

Where she was greeted with six dozen fresh cut flowers, new bedroom linen, and the distinct smell of fresh paint. The diva smiled and headed into her en-suite bathroom to take a much needed shower. "It'll do." she said in a perfect pitched singsong musical voice ever so softly. Inwardly knowing that one of the three musketeers would hear her.

Hidden in the hall way closet three very exhausted, sweaty, cover in paint and carpet fibers, individuals let out a sigh of relieve.

When their Diva was happy everyone was happy.

**Thanks for reading**

**Please Review**

**Taylor**

**}|{**


	3. Chapter 3

**Authors Note:**

**My first cross over, Ladies and gentlemen. Ok I know it's a bit of a train wreck, I was sitting at work yesterday and this is what popped in my head. I place Naya and her M&M commercials, as well as catching a few scenes of Ted the other night before I fell asleep. I could totally see miserable lonely Rachel making a wish that she had a real live walking talking bear as her best friend. So here it is I have like three chapters all written up. Depending on if this is reviewed , and enjoyed as the FLUFF that it is I will continue to write what pops in my head with this story line. I don't think there will be a set storyline that follows dates, I think it will be more just jumping around of things that will happen to them, and they will all be short little drabbles of Pezberry Life.**

**Thanks **

**Taylor**

**Please read and review**

**}|{**

**SENIOR YEAR**

Quinn looked down the hallway of McKinley high on high alert. Someone had slushied two members of the Diva squad, and that wasn't' good.

"Q."

"Britt-Britt!" Quinn pulled the blonde into her arms and kissed her. "Have you seen S?"

"Nope what's going on?"

"Jocks."

"Who?"

"Diva Squad." Quinn muttered a cautious look down the hall again.

"Why aren't we hiding."

"Because it never works."

"Right." Britt nodded and then they braced themselves as they watched the crowd part. Britt for once wasn't bouncing around. She stood stock still. Waiting for the inevitable meltdown.

"Good morning Brittany, Quinn."

"Hiya Rachie, S!" Brittany smiled but stood back against the bank of lockers.

"Q, Britt." Santana watched them, clearly Quinn was trying to convey something to her silently.

"What's the problem." She finally whispered when Rachel was busy with her locker. Books where going in, in a meticulous pattern as well as coming out the same way.

"Slushie… Diva…Meltdown." Quinn said barely over a whisper through her fake smile her lips never moving as she pretended to be watching the hallway.

"Who and who did it?" Santana asked leaning pretending to look at Brittany's drawing in Quinn's currently opened locker.

"Az and Hudson, and both Kurt and Mercedes."

"They never learn." Santana rested her head onto the locker in front of her counting, she never made it to five.

Rachel called out so softly in perfect pitch. "Coach!"

Within seconds the track suited cheer coach was standing to the left of Rachel looking around scowling at people, which included the Unholy Trinity. "Berry."

"Oh hello Coach, I'm so glad that you were able to hear me." Rachel smiled sweetly and placed a hand on the coaches wrist. "We have a situation."

Coach pursed her lips and her nose flared as she sniffed the air. "Grape." Rachel nodded. "Who?"

"Hudson and Azimo."

"Done see you at practice." Sue nodded and then stalked off down the hall way.

"Bye Coach." Rachel shut the locker door and raised a brow at the three girls that were doing their best to avoid her glare. "Inform the team that I'm unhappy with their safekeeping capabilities." she flipped her hair away from her face and flounced down the hall. Flashing them all a lot of skin from the action as the pleated skirt swished and flared. Their three groans weren't the only ones that were heard in the hallway.

Shooting the other member of the hallway a dirty look, that frightened the masses. Santana and Quinn, continued to leveled them all with threatening glares, as Brittany opened her locker and helped Red and Ted out.

"You know, that she knows, you were in there, right?"

"Listen I'm not taking one for the team, it isn't my turn." Red said leaning in the locker again. "Last time she told San that I would make the perfect topping to a cake, thank fuck I'm not Vegan friendly."

"It isn't my turn either. I confessed when we burnt the home-Ec classroom. I was nearly set on fire and threatened with a build a bear tour with toddlers." Ted quaked at the though as he climbed up Brittany for a snuggle.

"Well I got cut off and threatened to be kicked out, and had to suffer through a Streisand week long marathon. Because you two fucktards crashed the car into the garage." Santana pointed out.

"B and I have been cleaning up your messed not to mention dealing with the fall out for the last three years !"

"Then I guess it'll have to be someone else's turn." Brittany said snuggling Ted in her arms. "How about Mr. Schue?

"You know that Rach likes him. " Santana muttered "NO matter how bad he treats her."

"So we frame him, he's always upsetting her and never dealing with her wrath." Quinn smirked.

"Now all we have to do is find a patsy." Santana muttered then looked down the hall. "Ted it's been a few weeks since you and JBI had a chat."

On Wednesday the school population was greeted with a very badly spray tanned orange colored Mr. Schue. He had no eye brows, his skin had red blotches that you could see through the orange and he distinctively had a cut lip and was walking with a limp. Not to mention that his hair seemed to have a weird patchiness to it almost as if large sporadic chucks where missing all the way to his scalp.

Hudson and Azimo spent the day slushing themselves on the hour, not bothering to or having been forbidden to clean themselves up. Having to sit in the class with frozen bits of slush permeating their skin and clothes.

There was also a rumor that was going on that the two football players, were now part of the "Poop-n-Scoop" team for an environment eco friendly organization that cleaned up and recycled at the local Lima zoo.

"All seems right in the world." Rachel smiled snuggled into Santana's arms. Nodded to Q and B who flanked them. High-fived Red, and held out her hand to Ted as they walked into the school.

She was blissfully oblivious from the freaked out and freighted looks that she was receiving from the people around her.

**Thanks for reading**

**Please Review**

**Taylor**

**}|{**


	4. Chapter 4

**Authors Note:**

**Thanks **

**Taylor**

**Please read and review**

**}|{**

**Sophomore Year**

"Come on Rach I wanta go to the party."

"Ted I have homework, Noah's parties are always too loud, you get drunk and I have to drag you home kicking and screaming 'I'm not snuggly.'" Rachel muttered closing her eyes as if the idea alone was enough to give her nightmares.

"It doesn't happen every time." Ted defended from his perch on the bed, he was in time out because he had pulled off her sequins from her radio.

"Enough that I don't want to take a chance. If you want to go, go. But I'm staying home." Rachel ready over her homework making sure that it was all correct.

"Come on Rachelllll, you're like three weeks ahead. One night, could you at least pretend to be a teenager."

"What's the big deal if I go or not." Rachel demanded looking at him with narrowed eyes.

"I just don't like going without you."

"That's baloney. You, Puck and Red always have a blast." Rachel stopped what she was doing and turned to look at him fully. "What's really going on, and if you tell me a lie you'll regret it." she said threw her teeth.

"Someone told me that I can't get you to come tonight, I'm just trying to prove them wrong."

"Who and why?" Rachel stood with her hands on her hip.

"Quinn and Kurt, and they said you were too boring to party, that you may be destined to be head cheerio, but you're boring." Ted muttered hanging his head.

Rachel tilted her head. "Too boring, huh?" she said with a maniacal laugh. "We'll see about that."

Ted just looked over at his best friend with a frown. Scary Rachel tended to be a little frightening. He watched as she walked into her closet talking to herself. "What time is the party?"

"Starts at nine this week." Ted looked at the clock it was only eight. He looked at her cell phone and hit a text to Red that he would see him at the party.

"OK, I'll be ready at 9:45. Get out."

When they hit the Puckerman's house Ted was clinging to Rachel. This was bad this was really bad. Puck opened the door and nearly fell over, walking into the door as he tired to close it and step onto the porch at the same time. "_Rachel!"_

"Hello Noah," she said with a smile looking at him between her lashes. "I heard you're having a party."

"Argh.." he muttered looking her head to toe. "Dude how did you let this happen?" he demanded looking at Ted with a frown.

"What can I do, Dude?" Ted said wrapping his arms tighter against Rachel's bare thigh.

"Boy's can we go inside?"

Puck face cringed and he opened the door. The party was in full swing and people were falling over themselves drunk, dancing with one another. Ted held tight, knowing he looked like a fool clinging to Rachel the way he was, but he was honestly worried. No one knew Rachel the way he and Puck did, and that was just fine with them. _This is bad, so very bad. _

The music came to a screeching halt and everyone stopped and turned to look at them. Rachel smirked and walked to the back of the house into the kitchen where she could head Quinn and Santana fighting over the rules of some drinking game.

She walked in laughing when Ted was trying to get her to stay out of the kitchen. "Let Puck or I get you a drink." he pleaded.

The noise in the kitchen became silent and the two fighting cheerios turned to see what everyone was staring at. "Holy Fuck, the Hobbit's been holding out."

"Rachel!" Finn called out trying to cover her with his letterman. "You look cold." he said with that constipated look on his face.

"Actually, I'm fine thank you Finn, I'm not your girlfriend stop trying to mark me. I told you no enough times that one would think you can take a hint." she said with a sweet smile on her face as she looked past him to Kurt who's eyes were the size of golf balls.

"Hey Quinn, can't you get me a drink?" she said softly batting her eyes, and tilting her head slightly.

"Sure, Sure." the girl moved away from Santana and giving Rachel a once over again, biting her lip.

Santana looked at Rachel Freaking Berry, the real Rachel for the first time and it had her smirking. There she stood five foot nothing with legs for miles. Legs that were on full display under the miniscule skirt, that she had paired with a off the shoulder well-worn faded 80's tee-shirt. Never mind the 4inch strappy sandals, that made her perfect legs even more moth watering. "Hobbit, where you been hiding all my life."

"In plain sight, Baby about time you noticed." Rachel called back and laughed when Santana looked at her with suprise before she pulled her closer.

"Dude this is bad." Red muttered looking at the two girls flirting.

"So bad." Ted confirmed.

**Thanks for reading**

**Please Review**

**Taylor**

**}|{**


	5. Chapter 5

"Who's idea was this again?" Ted demanded as they hiked to the location marked on the map.

"No one said you had to tag along, Snuggles."

"Can it Diablo! You're not taking my girl out in the woods without witnesses." Ted said from where he was half in half out of Rachel's backpack.

"If one more things tries to eat me alive, I'm going to scream!"

"Dude, you're like made of chocolate what do you expect!" Ted snickered when Red shot him the finger as the girls laughed.

"You guys, Hobbit and I wanted to be alone for once, why did you insist on coming?"

"Someone has to save you from the Blair Witch." Red said looking at Rachel, who just raised a brow at him as she continued to hike to the lake area.

"Hobbit lets just get where we need to be, so that I can drowned Red in the lake." Santana said shoving him into her backpack and zipping it up you could hear his muffled screams through the material.

Ted was laughing hysterically until Santana did the same to him and smiled at the frowning Rachel. "Alone at last." she whispered kissing her girl on the lips and intertwining their fingers

"Tienda culo estúpido! ¿Por qué estás tan frustrante?" Santana kicked the tent for the third time. Looking at Rachel over her shoulder as the girl went about gathering wood for the fire pit.

"Baby, you collect the wood and I'll but the tent up." Rachel leaned over and kissed her,

"I can put the tent together, Hobbit."

"Of that I have no doubt, but can you do it before night fall?" Rachel teased with a kiss to the girls chin.

"Fine you think you can do better, have at it Hobbit." Santana tossed the tent poles and strings and metal anchors onto the tent. "I'll get the fire wood."

"Be careful , don't touch any of the plants just to be safe."

"This isn't the first time I've gone camping Rachel." she lashed out.

"I don't believe I said those words Santana."

_Fuck, now on top of everything Rachel was pissed off. Great can this day get any better?_ She huffed off because she was mad, mad that everything was ruined because dumb and dumber had tagged along to ruin her alone time with her Hobbit.

Santana grabbed armfuls of wood and headed back to the site. Of course the tent was up and all their supplies nicely placed inside. 'Nina perfecta." she muttered under her breath.

"Oh look Diablo is back, just in time to do…nothing." Ted laughed from his perch in the tree.

"Well you would know what looks like, since you do it all the time." she shot back at the overgrown teddy bear.

The dumb bear had the audacity to start signing 'hate on me'. loud enough for Rachel who was at the lake setting up the collapsible fishing poles to hear.

"Ted, be nice and come help me with baiting the hooks." she scolded him. "San, can you get the fire going? I have matches in my backpack."

"Yeah I'll get the fire, Where's Red?"

"In the cooler, he said he was so hot he was melting." Rachel scoffed rolling her eyes. Santana laughed at Red's dramatics it was barely over 70 today. She quickly had the fire going and it was a good thing since Rachel caught two fish moments later.

"Explain to me how eating fish is vegan?" Santana wondered out loud as Rachel went about spearing them over the fire

"oh it's not and I'm going to feel terrible about this for weeks. But this lake is over populated, and they're dying because there isn't enough sustenance to survive. So though it is against all that I stand for, this is the easier version of circle of life for them."

"Okay." Santana looked over at Ted who shrugged and just smiled lovingly at Rachel. _Stupid suck up._

"That's very reasonable of you Rach." he continued to win points, she flipped him off when Rachel's back was turned,

Later that night Rachel and Santana cuddled sharing one sleeping bag using the second under then as additional padding for the hard ground. Red was sleeping in the cooler, which Rachel complained was unsanitary and insisted he sit in a clean garbage bag. Ted was sitting at the entrance of the tent on look out duty,. Because Santana had informed them all that he wasn't the biggest baddest bare in these woods.

When there was a rustled outside the tent Santana, Ted and Red all screamed and shot out from where they were sitting.

"We're in the middle of the woods guys there are going to me weird noises go back to sleep."

"But it could be a bear!" They all shouted at her.

"Right and if it is we're all dead anyway." Rachel muttered and laid back down pulling Santana down with her using her as a pillow.

"It could a spider." Santana said "A really big spider!" she was shaking.

"I told you that, that picture was a fake." Rachel said sleepily.

"It was on the new Rachel!" she said pulling the sleeping bag closed.

"It was a prank for Christ sake."

"I still say it's a bear." Ted whined from his hiding place in Rachel's backpack.

"It could be a giant rat!" Red said from the cooler having lifted it just enough to whisper,

"Lions, Tigers and Bears…Oh my." Rachel laughed as she mocked them all snuggling deeper into the covers,.

"It could be a snake." Santana though with a shiver,

"Right time to go!" Rachel jumped out of Santana's arms and the sleeping bag. She grabbed her backpack, slung it over her shoulder, flipped the lid on the cooler grabbed the plastic bag that Red was in and fled the campsite, Santana trailing behind her.

"Next time we pitch a tent at the Best Western."


	6. Chapter 6

**2 Years After Graduation**

"Listen I didn't sign up for the crazy shit"

"It doesn't matter it only happens a few times a year suck it up, Red."

"Suck it up! Your best friend is ape shit crazy, and I'm stuck with dealing with the back lash."

"My best friend makes you best friend happy!" the bear said throwing petals all over the floor. "She also lets us live here rent free, she cooks for us, and buys us video games."

"She's still fucking nuts!" he muttered lighting the candles.

"V-day, birthdays, and anniversaries…that isn't asking a lot considering all that she does for us." The bear finished with the petals and checked around the bedroom one more time. "It looks good."

"Your girl is turning into girls." Red frowned looking at the bedroom. "It does look nice though."

"We better get out of here…it's number 11 on the list." Ted said looking over the "Anniversary Berry-Lopez to do list."

"Well lets get out of here the last time we weren't she went postal on us. I can't pull off pink…I can't do it." Red cried frantically as he ran down the hall and the stairs.

Ted found himself laughing, but he was hustling he couldn't pull off pink either. He sent a quick message to Rachel and he left the house.

}|{

Rachel pulled a giggling Santana up the stairs to Rachel's room. She was very happy that they had the house to themselves. It was going to be the most romantic Valentines day ever. They'd been together since the end of Sophomore Year, that had been four years ago.

They lived in New York now, coming back for summer and holidays to see Santana's Parents. Rachel's grandparents, the house she grew up in was paid for, and made no sense to sell when they moved. Especially with the market the way it was.

"Rachel…I love you." Santana whispered at the door to their room.

"I love you more."

"I don't think that's possible." Santana smirked and opened the door. "Oh wow!"

"I know, they did a really good job." Rachel pulled the Latina into her arms. "I just wanted our four year anniversary to be memorable."

Santana took a breath and grinned. "Me too." she dropped to her knees and pulled a box from her jacket pocket.

"Oh my god." Rachel whispered tears rolling down her face.

"Rachel Berry, will you do me the honor of keeping me in line, loving me, confiding in me, arguing with me for the rest of my life?"

"Oh my …yes! Yes. Oh Santana!" she pulled the woman to her feet and crushed their lips together. "I love you so much, happy anniversary baby."

"My hobbit, forever." Santana whispered.

"and Ever." Rachel promised.

Outside in the window Red handed Ted a tissue. "I knew it would be tonight."

"Well we better get out of here, Rachel catches us being pink will be the least of our problems." Ted muttered.


End file.
